Let's Talk About Sex
by CollegeCrazies
Summary: Or rather what bad ideas are during sex with our favorite Hetalia couples and ships (which is a LOT). Basically a compilation of the two of us just writing (mostly) a bunch of smut. So bunch of (mostly) one shots for everyone. Have fun!


(Uploaded by 'Coroner'- for short) So this began as what was supposed to be a short prologue… It turned into a part one… So obviously smut and sex (hence the 'M'), and it's rather detailed for me not writing any for about three years (which I'm pretty proud of). So I did use other languages in here. And other than French, I don't know if tenses for the others or correct and whatnot. I did try to make sure though. So forgive me if they're wrong. So here's a list of things used that are not English and they're almost all in order (I suggest making a list on your own paper or something)

Russian(spelled how you would hear them): asshole-mudak bitch-suka

poor child-bednyy rebenok shit-der'mo oh God-o Bozhe

Fuck you-poshel na khuy dumbass-tupitsa you are sexy-vy seksual'ny

My love-moya lyubov' I love you-Ya lyublyu tebya I love you too-Ya tozhe tebya lyulyu

No-net

German: my God-mein Gott gaddamnit-gottenverdammt fight(as in the action)-kampfen

French (there's a whole sentence so here's just the translation): Oh my God! This is fantastic!

Where is my camera when I need it!?

So there's all that. Hope you enjoy!

It was a World Meeting like any other. The countries always took turns hosting and this time it was America's turn to hold the meeting. So of course it was a little more 'fancy' from an American's perspective. As hard as it may be to believe, these personification of countries have human names and often use their country and human name interchangeably. And America was known for doing this at meetings. He was never real consistent about it either, especially since he had 'special' nicknames for some of the countries.

Everything had been fine and running smoothly until America started to become a little full of himself (as usual) and began just spitting thoughts out.

"And that's why I think McDonalds should be so common. It has nice consistency in taste,' he beamed proudly.

England rolled his eyes, "Well it certainly has more consistency than you when we have these meetings, you bloody yank."

America's face fell into a pout, "Oh c'mon Arthur. You don't have to be so mean… And you know it's true though. You've had the food before."

England huffed once before falling silent.

"I think Arthur is right Alfred," everyone stopped and looked around for where the voice came from. No one expected for it to be-

"Russia…," the country nearly growled, "And what exactly do you think Arthur is 'right' on, Ivan?" He practically spat every word out.

The slightly larger country shrugged, "I am just saying that you really don't ever contribute anything to any of our meetings, _mudak_." Everyone gasped. (Countries know every language.)

If the other superpower could shoot lasers from his eyes he would, "What, did you just call me?"

Every country there was sitting in shock watching the scene unfold in front of them.

"You heard me the first time _suka._ I do not believe I shuddered," Russia sat back in his chair, arms crossed.

Alfred was slowly losing his patience at the others Russian swears, "Alright, alright. You win. I don't contribute much. But I do have to ask. Which is better, Arthur, a Republic or Communist?"

The country in question stared in disbelief. He couldn't answer that. Not only was he afraid of any consequences, but that wasn't something you did at a meeting, angry or not. He stumbled over his words, "I-I-uh…," his face nearly flushed of all color, "You know I can't answer that!"

Germany sat back in his chair growing increasingly annoyed, "Zhat is ENOUGH! _Mein Gott!_ You two are being ridiculous!"

The two countries didn't hear anything he said and continued their death stares.

Germany felt a tug at his sleeve getting him to look slightly downward, "Should we-a go Ludwig? I don't-a want to be here when-a the fighting starts…"

The blond sighed, "In a minute Italy. Ve'll see if they'll calm down soon," the smaller country nodded lightly.

When America started speaking again everyone's attention was back at the two superpowers, "Alright ya God damn Commie. You wanna play? I'll play. What do YOU ever contribute to a meeting besides trying to take over everyone else's land?"

England had been sat next to Germany this time and scooted towards him and whispered, "Am I the only one seeing Ivan's aura changing?"

The other whispered back, "I don't see an aura, 'Mr. Majic', but his eyes are filled with death…," he could feel Italy scoot closer to him shaking. Russia stood up slowly. Germany shivered slightly, " _Gottverdammt_ …," he looked around at everyone else who seemed to have the same look…. Except for his brother, Prussia.

Prussia sat on the other side of Italy snickering. He loved it when bigger countries got into arguments.

Hungary, sitting next to him, nudged him whispering, "Don't encourage it Gilbert, you idiot."

He covered his face trying to hide his devilish grin.

Russia spoke again, "I do not mind the snide nickname, Alfred. What I DO mind, however, is you think that all I want is to rule the world," he smoothed the front of his coat.

Everyone could see America growing red in the face, "BULLSHIT YA DAMN COMMIE! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL THE RELATIONSHIP YOU HAVE WITH YOUR 'FRIENDS'? Do you even call those three your friends when you're home?!"

The taller superpower barely moved his neck producing a loud crack that made even Germany gulp in fear, "Do you even know me? No. Do NOT make assumptions about the relationship I have with my friends outside of public. You've not even been alive, as a true country, for any more than 300 years. Actually, you're not even THAT old yet are you?"

A small whisper from Gilbert could be heard across the room, " _Kampfen. Kampfen. Kampfen_ -" Hungary elbowed him in the side hard, "Ow! Elizabeta…," she gave a terrifying glare as he shut up.

The tension in the room was rising, "Ludwig…," Italy tugged at the others sleeve again with a worried expression.

Germany nodded, "Yes Feli… I know…," he turned to England, "I believe ve vill be taking our leave now Arthur."

England nodded in response, "Be my guest…"

With that the two other countries left quietly. Prussia, Austria, and Hungary soon followed, Hungary practically dragging Prussia out the door. "But Elizabeta… I vant to see zhe outcome…," Gilbert whined.

At that, a few other groups of nations had left as well. The Nordics followed soon after the mostly Germanic countries. Most of the southern half of the world left as well, finding themselves not needing to stay any longer. Those left mostly consisted of the old Allied Powers and some on lookers who wanted to see what would happen.

While this was all happening America was trying to come up with a good come-back, "Awe… _Bednyy rebenok_. You look stumped," he cooed trying to rile the other even more, "Oh come now. You don't have any snarky remarks?"

America puffed up in rage, "THAT'S IT!" he lunged at the light haired country, "YOU'RE DEAD RUSKY!"

Russia grinned at the advance allowing the blond nation to hit him full force as they tussled on the ground. Latvia, Estonia, Lithuania, and Ukraine backed themselves out of the way as quickly as they could. Belarus looked on angry, but backed away as well (with a guided tug from Ukraine).

No one wanted to get into the middle of the two superpowers fight. It would likely end in someone going to the hospital if they intervened.

The brawl kept going for a good while until-

"DER'MO!" Russia tripped backwards over a toppled chair. He began reaching for something to catch himself on.

"FUCK!" America began to fall forward as the other grabbed his jacket.

Everyone gasped at the sight in front of them, except France (who laughed with dirty thoughts in mind).

The two had fallen in such a way that America was straddling Russia, bent over his tall, strong form, and kissing. The two superpowers turned bright red in embarrassment and pulled away quickly.

America was the first to speak, "DUDE! WHAT THE HELL!?" he got up off the other quickly.

Russia began to sit up slowly rubbing where he hit his head, "I could ask you same question."

France laughed hard, "HONHONHONHON! Oh mon dieu! C'est fantastique! Ou est mon appareil photo quand je besion!?"

"Shut it, Francis!" America growled as he finished getting up, "No one wants to hear your perverted comments!"

Russia stood smoothing his jacket once again. His face flushed pink when he barely touched his 'vital regions' (as Prussia would call it). He stood somewhat awkwardly, making sure his coat stayed in a bunched up manner at a certain point.

England finally spoke up again, "Well Alfred, don't you think this meeting has come to an end, due to you two buffoons," he mumbled the last bit.

America coughed straightening himself, "Thank you those of you who have stayed. My apologies for my actions here today. Especially those of you who are part of Ivan's family and friends." Begrudgingly, he looks at Russia, "And sorry… Ivan… for calling you names…"

Russia stood some distance from the other, "Thank you. And… my apologies for my own insults."

The two shook hands as some of the others began to leave (Canada, China, Belarus, Latvia, Estonia, Lithuania). France put his hand to his face trying to hide his amusement of everything.

"Brother," Ukraine said softly, "Shell we be going home then?"

He didn't answer for a moment, "I believe Alfred and I have some making-up to do. We are, after all, supposed to be friends," he smiled kindly at her, "You go on ahead with the others."

She grinned and nodded as she left to follow the others out the door.

"C'mon frog face," England grabbed France by his collar, "Let's leave the two to discuss amongst themselves."

"But Arthur," he whinned.

"Shut up, Francois," he grumbled annoyed.

The room was silent without the chatter of the others, making Russia's situation even more uncomfortable. "So…," he began.

"So why did you really stay behind Ivan? It couldn't be to actually talk," Alfred stood in such a way that actually showed off how flexible and thin he really was.

Ivan's face burned a bright red that started to creep up to his ears, "Uh…"

"Well?" the blond started to seem impatient.

"I- uh… I just- I just thought that maybe talking out our differences could do us good for the next meeting."

Blue eyes dug deep into Ivan's soul. Alfred licked his lips nonchalantly, "Is that all then?"

Dark purple eyes dilated slightly and light colored eyebrows shot into the bangs of equally light hair, "Yes. I'm sure"

The nation in the bomber jacket took a step closer, "Are you sure dude? You honestly look a little warm. Why don't you take off your coat?"

 _"Oh god…"_ Ivan thought to himself, _"I'm getting all excited for nothing… My minds just clouded by… my… lust?"_ "o Bozhe," he gasped slightly as he realized he said it out loud.

"What is it man? You forget something? We gave our apologies. You ok?"

Russia took a step back trying not to succumb to primal instincts, "Y-Yeah… I'm fine. Really. I just need to sit. It is rather warm in here. Do you mind getting me a glass of water?"

America looked at the other confused, "Uh… Sure thing dude. Be right back."

Once the blond left the room Ivan let out a sigh of relief. Now he could focus back on his anger and frustration that caused him this damn issue. Maybe that would make it go away. After trying to fester in anger, it ended up not working. Instead he thought more about what had happened in those brief seconds. The way Alfred felt pressed up against him. The feel of his lips. The slight smell of sweat from working on the farms. And the anger. The anger was still there. All he wanted to do was slam the other into a wall and take him. Take him hard and forcefully. His mind reeled back to the present when the other walked back in.

"Here ya go dude. Good cup of cold water," Alfred walked across the room closer and closer, "Hope you're not getting si-"He was quickly cut off.

Ivan rose quickly and rushed to the other, pushing him hard against the wall. The water fell to the floor making a puddle on the carpet.

"DUDE! WHAT IS WRONG WI-," a feeling pressed against his neck. He moaned loudly, "Ivan! Wh-What are y-you doing man?!"

The Russian had brought his lips quickly to Alfred's neck and sucked hard, "You! Alfred F. Jones. You are difficult aren't you?" He rubbed his erect member against Alfred's crotch, eliciting another moan he continued, "You enjoyed that kiss didn't you? Just as much as you enjoyed fighting me. Am I wrong?"

Alfred was trying to keep up with what was being said in quick broken English, "I-I-."

"Oh come now Alfred. I thought you hated me? What could have changed so quickly?" He raised the others arms above his head with one of his large hands and tightened his grip.

Alfred didn't know whether his whimper was from the pain, or how turned on it made him, "Ivan…," he panted, "I-I-," another moan came out as this time his neck was marked with a bite. Hard enough to leave a mark, but not to break skin.

Ivan grinned against the others neck. He hummed. "Do you like being controlled, Alfred?"

America bit his lip trying not to moan wantonly, "N-No… Of course not. Especially not by a-" he moaned again as he was cut off with another bite to his neck.

Ivan grinned devilishly, "By a what? A 'Commie'?" Using his other hand he gripped Alfred's cock, squeezing firmly. Grinning even more when he got another moan in response.

Alfred panted, "Oh god….," his fists clenched together above his head.

"What is it dear Alfred," Ivan teased as he started rubbing roughly through the khakis, "Tell me… _suka_. Do you want me to… _poshel na khuy_?"

The blond shivered at the russian words whispered in his ear, "I-I-…. D-d-d-da…," he repeated in the others native tongue.

Ivan chuckled lightly, "Good." He removed his hand from the others wrists and began rubbing his chest through his shirt and kissing him roughly.

When the two finally separated to breath Alfred had to say something, "Wh-Why are we doing this?" he gasped, "I-I-I mean… W-We sh-shouldn't be doing this. Oh god…..," he groaned as Ivan started grinding on him.

"And w-why shouldn't we b-be doing this, Alfred?" The sensations felt fantastic, but the Russian needed to feel more.

"W-Well…," he struggled, "We're enemies n-now. Aren't we?"

"Are we?" Ivan questioned in the others ear.

The words licked at Alfred' ear and he started feeling weak at the knees as the other kept grinding on him.

Ivan sighed lustfully, "We d-don't have to be enemies y-you know."

"Y-You just want me to b-become one," Alfred protested.

"N-No… N-Not with you. N-Not as a country you _t-tupitsa_."

At being called yet another curse, Alfred pushed his hips forward, "Stop calling me names d-damnit," he said through gritted teeth trying to hold back another moan.

"Oh vy seksual'ny, Al'fred," he forced him hard against the wall again.

"DON'T C-CALL ME 'S-SEXY' R-R-RUSKY!"

Ivan Nearly laughed as he sucked at Alfred's neck again, "Do you like it rough? Because I'm beginning to believe you do." He ripped America's bomber jacket off throwing it to the ground and kissed him hard.

The jacket hit with a sound 'plop'. Alfred couldn't hold back any longer. His hands quickly reached for the others back drawing him in closer, grinding hard against him. Ivan threw his head back briefly. Alfred had the chance he'd been waiting for. He latched quickly on to the pale skin just under the others scarf.

Ivan cried out in a moan deep in his throat. Alfred brought his hands to the front and began undoing buttons on the tan long coat. It fell quickly to the floor. Ivan grabbed at the others button-up shirt, tearing the buttons off as he ripped it open exposing the tan skin beneath. He grunted lightly. He wanted to taste it.

Alfred hit his head against the wall as he threw his head back. Ivan began sucking hard at his nipples. It felt so good. If he didn't control himself he was going to cum right then and there. "OH GOD! IVAN!" he cried out. His hands holding him steady against the wall.

Russia couldn't help himself. His skin tasted so good. He could smell that same sweet, dirty sweat again. He started running the tips of his fingers up and down the tan man's abs and sides, granting him a sound shudder and another moan.

Alfred removed his hands from the wall and began tearing at Ivan's own shirt throwing it to the ground. His hands quickly reached for the buttons on Russia's green pants. The man groaned against his nipple. His heart was pounding fast in his chest. His head was swirling. God, it felt so good.

Ivan began doing the same to Alfred's khakis and they were both standing in nothing but boxers (and Russia in his scarf). It was a flailing of arms grabbing every spot of visible skin possible as Ivan moved back up to kiss Alfred.

America grunted in surprise when he felt his feet leaving the floor. Russia brought him over to sit on the table that other nations had previously been sitting at. Ivan laid him back briefly and took off his red, white, and blue boxers.

The larger country gave a chaste kiss before lowering his head to the others crotch. Alfred gasped and moaned as lips went around his tip. His head fell back, his cowlick bouncing. Tan-blond hair swished as Ivan started bobbing up and down. America twitched and shuddered at the sensation. Holding himself up with one hand, he grabbed the light colored locks with the other, "Oh my god, IVAN!" He shouted.

Russia hummed as he sucked America in deep. The hand on his head gripped tighter. A thought flew into his head. He came off Alfred with a 'pop'. The golden blond whimpered missing the feeling. Ivan took his scarf off, for the first time in a long time, and quickly bound the others wrists together with it.

Alfred stared lustily at the other after being bound. He kind of wanted to be used and abused now. He looked down at the pulled fabric in Ivan's boxers and whined slightly. This brought the broad man's attention to him.

Ivan looked where the other was looking. He knew what Alfred was thinking. He stood and beckoned the blond off the table by pulling at the secured scarf.

Alfred was on his knees in front of the bulge he'd been eyeing. He went to take it off with his bound hands.

The pale man pulled the scarf to the side, pulling the others hands with it. He shook his head, "Use your teeth _moya lyubov'_ ," he ordered. The other nodded and grabbed the hem with his teeth tugging it down slowly.

His teeth purposefully skimming the erect member in front of him as he pulled the clothing further and further down. Soon his forehead was at the others knees. He kissed his way back up to the others cock, laying a kiss on the tip before taking it into his mouth.

Ivan's legs quaked slightly as Alfred worked his way up to his base with nothing but his lips and tongue. It felt so good. He just wanted to fuck the blond rough and hard. He could feel his heart racing as well as his brain, trying to come up with what to do next. He still had some rage in his blood as he thought.

Alfred was pulled away roughly by his golden locks. He looked at the other with hazy eyes. Ivan pushed him back towards the table where he stopped as he bumped it. Soon America had fingers shoved in his face. "Suck." The other demanded. Alfred did as he was told. There was a strange look in those purple eyes. It was a mix of rage and lust, Alfred noticed. _He must still have some frustration from earlier_ , he thought to himself.

Ivan pulled his hand away and turned Alfred around quickly, bending him over the table. He pressed one finger against the tight entrance, slowly working it to stretch. Once he wiggled his finger around then added another slowly. The other cried out in a mixture of pain and pleasure as he was slowly stretched and scissored. Finally, a third finger was added as slowly as the other two. Ivan finger fucked Alfred slowly, and torturously. He skimmed his target as the blond jerked in front of him. "Are you ok _moya lyubov'_?" The other nodded gasping. He continued moving in and out slowly.

Suddenly Alfred felt empty. He wanted Ivan to enter him so badly. Fucking him till he couldn't think straight. He moaned and tried pushing back into the other. He got a slap to his ass in return.

Ivan was satisfied with the response of a gasp to his blow. The other was still tied up. Everything was perfect. He lined himself up with the other and began to slowly push in. Alfred groaned slightly at the size. God he was so tight. Once in, the Russian pulled out slowly and thrust back in a few times.

It felt fantastic to begin with, but when Ivan started fucking him so hard he had to steady himself with his bound hands, it was heaven. He moaned with no regrets as to whether anyone heard him or not.

With every move Ivan got a good response. But there was one thing… He wanted to see the others face. He whispered in Alfred's ear, "I-I-I want-t-t to see y-your face," he felt himself shuddering at the thought of seeing the others face when they came.

Alfred nodded in agreement. No words could escape his lips. It just came out as moans and gasps. As Ivan pulled out he groaned at the loss of being so full. He was laid on the carpet as the other joined him and put his knees to his chest.

Ivan smirked, "Y-Y-You're very f-flexible," he panted as he took the draping parts of the scarf and tied it to Alfred's ankles. He lined up once again to the others entrance and pushed in. He brought his face to Alfred's and gave him a kiss after each thrust.

America moaned into each kiss. He started to feel the buildup in his abdomen, "Oh… God… I-I'm g-g-gonna come, I-I-Ivan…," he panted looking deep into purple eyes.

Ivan kissed him hard and started thrusting faster. Grabbing Alfred's cock in hid large hand, he pumped it in unison with his thrusting. Alfred cried loudly, "OH GOD! IVAN!" Opal liquid covered their chests. It was only brief moments after that Ivan too came with a cry, "OH ALFRED!" He came hard inside the other. He pulled out slowly, breathing hard, and untied the others ankles. He collapsed on top of the blond.

They lay on the floor panting hard. Ivan soon had bound arms wrap their way around his neck. His eyes fluttered open, "Yes _moya lyubov'_?"

Alfred just grinned and gave him a loving kiss.

Laying on the floor coming down from their climactic high Alfred groaned slightly.

"What is it Alfred?" The other asked knowing it wasn't a comfortable groan.

"My back hurts…"

Ivan chuckled, "Of course it does. I just fucked you silly." He began untying his scarf.

"No, no. Not that kind of hurt…," he stretched his arms as they were freed, "I mean like all the way up and down my back… It hurts."

Purple eyes widened with some worry, "Let me look at you _lyubov'_ ," checking the other country's back he saw a long red mark from his shoulders to his luscious round ass. He paused, "Well… It's nothing bad."

"Oh god… What is it? Anytime you say something like that it's always bad…"

"No, no. You simply have rug burn."

"Awe. Seriously?! Damnit… Fine…"

Ivan hugged him from behind as he began pulling his boxers on, "I'm sorry."

Alfred smirked, "It's ok. Just no carpets next time."

Russia was taken aback briefly, "'Next time'?"

"Yeah. We're a thing now. Aren't we?"

He wasn't expecting the American to want to do it again. He thought about it as they both redressed themselves, "I-I suppose so," he grinned wide as he pulled his coat on.

Alfred giggled and grinned happily, "Good. Because I rather enjoyed that. And…," he hesitated, "I think… _YA lyublyu tebya_ …" he blushed bright red.

"Oh _moya lyubov'! Ya tozhe tebya lyulyu!_ ," he pulled Alfred in for a kiss before picking him up in his arms bridal style.

"Hey!" the American giggled, "Put me down."

" _Net._ I'm taking you home like this."

Alfred blushed nuzzling into his new boyfriends scarf, "Ok…"

Ivan looked down and the other was asleep. He chuckled lightly, "Too much for one day _moya lyubov'_?" He kissed Alfred on his forehead.

So this wasn't supposed to end like this, but I got a little carried away… So for now this is part one of the AmeRus stories. Here are the list of translations again in case you missed it before.

Russian(spelled how you would hear them): asshole-mudak bitch-suka

poor child-bednyy rebenok shit-der'mo oh God-o Bozhe

Fuck you-poshel na khuy dumbass-tupitsa you are sexy-vy seksual'ny

My love-moya lyubov' I love you-Ya lyublyu tebya I love you too-Ya tozhe tebya lyulyu

No-net

German: my God-mein Gott gaddamnit-gottenverdammt fight(as in the action)-kampfen

French (there's a whole sentence so here's just the translation): Oh my God! This is fantastic!

Where is my camera when I need it!?

Hope everyone enjoyed. And if there are any translations that are wrong let me know. Because the only one I have any serious experience with is French.


End file.
